The Guardian is now declaring "vegan" a slur — the latest bid by the establishment press to manufacture a victim class and police your speech — while the Texas Senate race that could determine chamber control comes down to a massive spending gap nobody wants to talk about.

The press wants you to clutch pearls because Republicans are calling Democrats vegans. The real story: that Democrat is outspending his GOP opponent seven to one, and the Republican money machine is sitting on hundreds of millions while its candidate trails in the polls.

Back in May, Trump called Texas Democratic Senate candidate James Talarico "a vegan." Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton tried to brand him "Tofu Talarico" and called him "a vegan who thinks God is non-binary," according to The Guardian. The outlet framed this as "vegan suddenly being used as a slur" — as if dietary preferences now constitute a protected class deserving the same linguistic boundaries as actual civil rights.

Meanwhile, CNN reports that Talarico has had the Texas airwaves largely to himself for weeks, spending roughly seven times more than Republicans since June. Polls now show Talarico with a narrow lead in a race that could determine which party controls the Senate. MAGA Inc., which sits on a $400-million-plus war chest, has so far declined to spend on Paxton's behalf.

"They keep saying they'll spend, but they haven't," one senior GOP source told CNN.

The Guardian also reported that Republicans have targeted other Democratic candidates over vegan connections: Colorado's Manny Rutinel was called "a far-left vegan activist who wants to end animal agriculture"; Arizona's Amish Shah was hit for his "wacky liberal agenda pushing vegan policies"; and Iowa's Lindsay James drew heat for supporting "meatless May."

What's telling is how the candidates responded — not by defending the choice, but by running from it. Talarico's team issued a response to what The Guardian called "vegan accusations" — treating a dietary preference like a criminal charge — with a photo of him eating a giant hunk of meat. Talarico himself said, "I've been eating barbecue since before Ken Paxton's first indictment." Rutinel clarified he's not vegan now, saying he needs to "enjoy the delicious products that Colorado ranchers make" and dismissed his past animal-rights Reddit posts as "the views of a 22-year-old kid." A spokesperson for James said she has "always sided with Iowa farmers."

The Guardian finds this "depressing" and wishes someone would defend veganism as a qualification for office. That's the tell: the press isn't reporting on speech suppression. They're arguing a political attack line should be off-limits — adding another word to the list you're not allowed to say.

Back in Texas, Paxton carries his own baggage: a 2023 impeachment vote by the Texas House over allegations of bribery and corruption, though the state Senate acquitted him on all charges. Trump told reporters, "I'm going to help Ken Paxton and I'm going to spend a lot of time in Texas." A pro-Paxton outside group just launched an $800,000 ad blitz. But the NRSC and the Senate Leadership Fund — which backed Cornyn in the primary — are still waiting for MAGA Inc. to take the lead.

The press wants a new speech rule. The candidates want to win. The money wants to wait. Only one of those matters in November.