According to reports, local man Charlie Chesterton stopped paying his mortgage after hearing Billie Eilish explain that no one is illegal on stolen land. The brilliance of this argument hit home with him as he pondered the serious implications of living on stolen land. As he explained to his banker, he is ok with living on stolen land, but sees no reason to pay for it as stolen land is basically free. At press time, the fascist bank had placed a 'for sale' sign in Charlie's front yard in a brazen attempt to steal and deport him from his stolen land.
Breaking
The Atlantic staff writer McKay Coppins penned a lengthy feature, "Sucker: My year as a degenerate gambler," that detailed an experiment wagering on NFL games....
Kelly Clarkson accused "American Idol" of lying about the $1 million prize she was supposed to receive after winning the singing competition's first season in 2002....
Hall of Fame coach Tony Dungy confirmed NBC is letting him go after 17 seasons on "Football Night in America." He said he is unsure of his next steps....
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