Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson issued an alert last week warning the Windy City's citizens to get their murdering done before the beloved crime-ridden streets are invaded by the National Guard. The mayor urged swift action as this may be the last chance for Chicago residents to enjoy drive by's, stray bullet killings, and random senseless murders for some time. Stocking up on murders now will be essential for surviving the long peaceful days ahead. But that's not all that happened last week!